Ep. 54 - Why Parenting Feels Harder Than Ever

Parenting has never been easy, but today’s parents are navigating screen time, social media, anxiety, endless advice, and the constant pressure to get everything right.

Dr. Andrew Rosen and Dr. David Gross are joined by psychologist Dr. Alexandra Licata for a thoughtful and relatable conversation about the challenges facing children, adolescents, and their parents. They talk about the rise in childhood anxiety, declining confidence, the role of screens, and why overwhelmed parents often find themselves searching for quick fixes when meaningful change takes time and consistency.

The conversation turns to practical ways parents can reconnect with their children, set limits without getting pulled into every emotional moment, and recognize small signs of progress. From spending 20 focused minutes together to learning how to validate a child’s feelings while still holding a boundary, they explore why getting back to basics can make a real difference.

They also talk about parental guilt, repairing relationships after arguments, anxiety that can look like ADHD, and why parents don’t have to handle every difficult moment perfectly. Sometimes the most important thing a family can learn is how to recover, reconnect, and move forward together.

Contact the Docs:

Email: twoshrinksandamic@gmail.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:09

Hi, I'm Dr. David Gross, psychiatrist. And I'm Dr. Andrew Rosen, psychologist, and welcome to Two Shrinks in a Mike today. Today, our format's a little bit different. We have the uh privilege of having Dr. Alexandra Lakata, who's a psychologist at our Center for Treatment of Anxiety and Mood Disorders, as well as the Children's Center for Psychiatry, Psychology, and Related Services. And we invited her here to talk about her experiences with uh mainly children and adolescents, uh, because we don't really get a chance to talk much about that on our uh podcast. So this should be really interesting. So let me introduce Dr. Lakata. Dr. Lakata, welcome to the podcast. Can you tell us a little bit about you?

SPEAKER_00 0:56

Yes, thanks for having me. Um so a little bit about me. Um, Boca Ratone, raised, right, born and raised in Boca Ratone. Um I have a background in clinical psychology and a background in school psychology. Um been working for the center for several years now. Um, I would say right now I'm honing in on children and parents. A lot of my work centers around um anxiety, uh, depression, adolescence. Um, but right now I'm really targeting a lot of parenting strategies and how I can help parents feel a little bit more empowered to support their children in the world today. There's a lot of things that come up when it comes to screen time or um consequences or how to react in the moment or how to keep your parent calm or um you know what works and what doesn't. Um there's a lot of different style parenting out there right now. So I think finding what works best for your family is really important, but also, you know, getting back to basics right now, I think is important for sure.

SPEAKER_05 1:57

Got to tell you that when when I was in school, the school psychologist was a cop whose job was to break up fights. So I think the concept of a school psychologist may be relatively new to people. So could you tell us some what does the school psychologist? Because people may think that you're in a school all the time, which you're not, but I'm sure there are people in schools who function as uh social workers, et cetera. But what does the school psychologist tend to do in general?

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah, so school psychology um It focuses a little bit on testing, you know, evaluating kids. It also focuses on providing support in, you know, through the in the classroom, pulling them out of the classroom. It also has a little bit of a niche in helping staff and administration understand how they can support the kids in school. Um, you know, a lot of administration's not trained specifically on behavioral techniques or strategies to support specific learning differences or you know, neurodifferences like anxiety, depression. Um, so I guess as a school psychologist, your role is really to provide you know those evaluations to test for you know anything that any strengths and weaknesses of kids to help them get support in schools, um, help the staff understand how to support them and help the kid better feel supported in the school environment, whether it's helping you know, breathing techniques or stepping out for a minute or a walk around the school with a supported trusted adult. Just those little techniques can really go a long way, and helping the administration understand that is really helpful as well.

SPEAKER_04 3:31

There's a lot of data now that indicates that the incidence rate of psychological, behavioral, and psychiatric problems in children and adolescents is going through the roof. And um You know, it it's pretty evident that that's true, I think, nationally, uh maybe even internationally. Do you see any trends in that direction? And and do you see any particular types of patterns that you've noticed in in in the practice, in a in a in our practice, private practice, that um has become obvious to you? And then what maybe we could do is spend a few minutes speculating on how come this increase in in uh diagnostics has uh occurred.

SPEAKER_00 4:22

Like with a bird's eye view, I would see there's a lot of there's a lot more anxiety I'm seeing, I would say. Um it's more intense, it's more generalized. Um I'm I'm noticing a trend of a lot of children feeling less confident in themselves, less capable, uh, more pressures. It's a different world we live in today. Right. So I would say I'm seeing a trend of anxiety start earlier and intensify through adolescence more so than I have before.

SPEAKER_05 4:55

Do you think the screen the the issue of social media plays a role there in making this world so different?

SPEAKER_00 5:01

I do. I really do. And when I'm talking with parents, um, you know, I don't villainize the screens because I don't think it's the screens as a whole. I really think it's, you know, empowering parents to set limits, to continuously get involved in what they're watching. I think it has a lot to do with content, time frame, and also recognizing the signs of isolation and anxiety. How do we buffer this? You know, one friend on the weekend, um, you know, depending obviously in the community you live in and you know the dynamics of the family, but buffering it with connection. Or if someone's if the child's really into a video game, sitting with the child for 20 minutes and asking them a question. So they're having that quality connection, but also doing something that they love. So changing the game around screens and not just completely removing them, I think is going to be helpful.

SPEAKER_04 5:49

One of the things that I've noticed is that you know, the screens, we'll call them screens, uh, have become very convenient and inexpensive babysitters. Whether it be at home or in the car, in the restaurant, or anywhere else. You just you just see it wherever you go. It's kids are on their screens and it allows parents to, you know, do parent things, which I understand, but I think uh it's created and there's a wonderful book, as you probably know about the anxious generation, where it talks about uh there's a greater reliance on the screen and less reliance on parents, interaction, and even you know, viewing parents as a source of good information. So it when when I I don't see kids really, but when I do talk to parents, uh it's it's I try to convey the importance of creating a shift back to more you know interactive parenting. But it's hard. Parents are overwhelmed, parents are, you know, working two jobs, or parents are very active in other kinds of things, and they just don't have time, they say. So it's it's a real dilemma. And I'm I'm certainly not sure about how we go about changing any of that at this point.

SPEAKER_05 7:07

You know, it's become an electronic pacifier, but the difference is that pacifiers were used effectively when the kids are between what, one and two, but then you take the pacifier away. But the uh social media screens aren't taken away. And I've been concerned about the fact that kids can now get bullied in school and they can get bullied online. And that uh I don't know if you've seen that in in your experience that the amount of bullying goes up because of that.

SPEAKER_00 7:32

Yeah, no, it definitely does. I think the earlier start, the earlier a child is, you know, sat in front of a screen with independent time, with no interaction, with less limits, with just free-for-all, obviously I think that's going to pave the way for definitely more inappropriate connections or you know self-esteem or negativity around the world around them or the people around them. But I think as um uh to your point, uh Dr. Rosen, what you were saying about the something about the screens. I wanted to piggyback off of that.

unknown 8:12

I thought my training thought.

SPEAKER_04 8:14

Well, what I was saying is that the parents have become reliant on it, and you know, their program for themselves now is so reliant on it that it's very hard for them to pull back and and reconfigure what they do with their diet and their light.

SPEAKER_00 8:29

Yes, exactly what I wanted to piggyback off. Um I think one of the reasons, and I think it speaks true to parenting right now, that there's so much burnout. The world right now is just much different than it has been for other generations, obviously. But the burnout makes a lot of these devices feel very easy. Very, very easy. Um so typically when I'm instructing parents to kind of decrease the screen time or increase interaction time within the family, I make it a very um kind of a smaller task. So 20 minutes, 20 minutes of no screens, sitting with your child, talking about what they like to do, um, not really probing about their day, letting them be the guide, but 20 minutes a day just with that full that quality and proximity can go a long way as well.

SPEAKER_04 9:16

Do you find resistance or difficulty with compliance?

SPEAKER_00 9:21

I do. I also I also have I also have found that sometimes the buy-in isn't always there. I think right now a lot of I don't want to speak generalize all parents, but I am seeing this theme of like quick fixes and um nothing's changing. This isn't helping. Why am I still doing this type of thing? So really getting their buy-in for like kind of rigid consistency is really tough right now. Really tough. And I find myself emphasizing that so much. And then some of the parents that I do feel have like really honed in on that consistency are seeing these small changes, these moments of progress.

SPEAKER_05 10:02

I don't you know, I agree that the the parents are more stressed than before, but I I don't understand why. I mean, I it's uh I don't know if it's because of the fact that people exposed to tough news 24-7 or but uh you know, from from my perspective as a parent, the world hasn't changed that much. Kids have changed a lot because of social media and the pressures to do well. But what do you think any thoughts about why the burnout is occurring?

SPEAKER_00 10:26

I would say even for parents, it has a lot to do, just like you said, a lot of the information coming in. I think I'm seeing a lot of parents feeling less confident about their parenting. Um, there's so much information about how to do it the right way, or this is the best way, or try this consequence, or gentle parenting. I think there's just an over an abundance of am I doing it the right way? So empire empowering parents to really like trust their instinct, rely on some information, appropriate information, and move forward and try things is way back when would Dr.

SPEAKER_05 10:57

Spock was our Bible, you know? And it made it easy because if you follow the book, that's all there was to it. But now that's that's not the case.

SPEAKER_04 11:04

You know what I think is uh it's the concept of whoever dies with the most toys wins. I think our culture today is very much caught up in more, more, more. And lots of parents see other parents doing more, more and more, getting more and more and more, having greater expectations for what they're supposed to do with their lives and with their kids. And and it just keeps fomenting and building and boiling and and they can't catch up with it. And so um, you know, it's just that there's no limit to the more, more, more, and that's very stressful when you're chasing your tail every day. Uh there's no kitchen table anymore. Who sits I've talked about it many times on the podcast. Nobody sits at the kitchen table with their kids anymore. It might as well get rid of the table.

SPEAKER_00 11:55

Yeah, I know that's a good point. I'm I absolutely try to recommend when I'm it once a week. Even if it's a quick meal, you're getting that amazing.

SPEAKER_04 12:04

I know. Once a week. I know, I know.

SPEAKER_00 12:06

I'm like, I caught myself saying it out loud. I was like, oh, it doesn't sound great, but I appreciate the moments of progress that parents are willing to put in and see the efforts. And it's not like pro moments of progress aren't measured in them, their children not feeling emotions. Moments of progress are measured in, you know, your kid doesn't want to do your homework. So instead of throwing the pencil, they say, I need a break, progress. Or you're leaving the park and it doesn't take 30 minutes for them to calm down, it takes 10 progress. So really highlight highlighting those changes within the family dynamic consistently can kind of give the parent a little bit of a uh-huh. That is a difference.

SPEAKER_04 12:49

Must be tough for you though, because like you said before, they have these expectations that, you know, look, I've been coming here for four weeks with my kids, why haven't they changed yet? You know? And they do, I know, they they pull them. You know, okay. What about meds? Can we go with meds instead? Because what we're doing isn't working.

unknown 13:06

Right.

SPEAKER_04 13:06

That kind of thing.

SPEAKER_05 13:07

How do you get the parents to buy in and and agree that doing this work makes sense?

SPEAKER_00 13:15

Um that's a really good question. I feel like I've seen the most progress when I truthfully, I feel like I've they have obviously um protective factors, you know. They have the time to sit, they have the time to interact, they have, you know, a community behind them. Obviously, those things matter. I can't speak to every community, but what I see in our community is they have more protective factors. Um also, you know, back to basics, like the fit of the clinician, truthfully, when I am putting in all I can and I'm showing them, look, here's here's the science behind it. Here's what the here's what our progress looks like. And I'm showing them trend lines and they're seeing this data and they're seeing small changes and they're honing in on that. I do think that does make the difference. It's kind of more of like being on top of them. I think that really does make the difference. It's more work, but it does help them see a different perspective than that bubble they were in before.

SPEAKER_05 14:13

Aaron Powell How frequently do they come in with the notion that they must have failed as a parent, and that's why the kids having a problem or feeling guilty about the difficulties and you know, my bad mother or a bad father?

SPEAKER_00 14:25

I would say 75% of the time.

SPEAKER_05 14:27

So I guess half the battle in the beginning is to help them deal with that that guilt and recognize that it may not be their fault and they can move forward in a positive way.

SPEAKER_00 14:36

Aaron Powell It is. I'm seeing a lot of that lately, and I'm starting a lot of my discussions with parents, really validating them and empowering them to be like, look, your instinct was right here. You were right here. This was the right. I know you don't like to see your child suffering, or you know, they cried for an extra 40 minutes, or like just really validating that their instincts were actually that's the right path. You did the right thing. Let's see how it comes, what let's see what happens next time when we intervene like that. Did they cry a little bit less? Did they come to you and voice this home feeling? Those are all things like consistency and moments of progress.

SPEAKER_05 15:11

You know, I'm not I'm not a child psychiatrist, but every time I sit in our meetings for the Children's Center, I'm amazed at how effective kids are in controlling the family. You know, they're expert at that, and and and you'd think it'd be a sophisticated, complicated process, but it really isn't. It's all conditioning. And I guess half the battle then is to have the parents regain the control.

SPEAKER_00 15:31

Yeah, that's actually a really good point. So a lot of times I am finding there is a lot of overthinking, a lot of overthinking and overanalyzing. And I find myself being like, we're not gonna make this a thing today. This is a behavior, we're gonna respond and we're gonna move forward. We're not gonna rehash, we're gonna make it a brief intervention, we're gonna move forward with our day, day-to-day functioning. But I do find that I am having a lot of families that are so in the moment of these emotional expressions. And while I don't want to invalidate that, but typical functioning during the day, we have to we have to learn to recover more quickly. We have to learn to be well adjusted, right? So when I have these parents that aren't so that are learning to like take a step back and be like, that was a behavior. I'm gonna address this, I'm gonna respond, and I'm gonna move forward and see what happens next time. We're gonna keep it consistent. It can really take kind of the personalization or emotional side of it out of it as much.

SPEAKER_04 16:26

One of the things that I've noticed and observed, you know, if I go back old school, there was little dialogue between parent and child. It was this is what you need to do, and you better do it, you know. And what I've observed now is it's just such a other end of the continuum in that regard, where parents are using reasoning, conversation, logic, um, trying to help the child understand better what would be the better response, and on and on. And in some respects, over empowering the child to make decisions that they're not capable of making. And I you know, that's very much reinforced on our culture now as well. You know, don't don't bully your child, so to speak. Let the child come up with it on their own. And I I think that's gotten so overdone that um it's really taken away a lot of the the ability of a parent to enforce certain things. And then if they try to enforce it, it's usually done out of frustration and then they feel guilty about it. So it's a vicious circle that way. When you how often do you actually work with the kids themselves in any of these things? Or is it primarily the parents?

SPEAKER_00 17:41

It's a mixture of both for sure. Um I think I see a lot of kids that do have some weaker areas in their skills. So we really hone in on regulation and even just labeling. Like that was upsetting. I I don't like that you did that. I was mad, I'm mad about that. Um, a lot of kids will use like not a lot, but some kids will, you know, turn to either aggression or um something less helpful with a coping tool. So, like with the kids specifically, obviously that verbal output. I want them to like kind of learn how to express themselves. I want them to learn how to ask for breaks, advocate for themselves, um, recover, recover. Mom said no, dad said no, we're we're moving forward. The no is what the answer is. You know, we can work through this. And I really hone in on like that word and you can be disappointed and we're still leaving. So I really want parents to validate but keep the limit. Because if we do just the validation, it kind of borders that permissive style where the child feels like, wait, I can reason, I can bargain, wait.

SPEAKER_05 18:47

Very good point.

SPEAKER_00 18:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 18:50

How often do you end up getting involved in uh study skill training and helping the kids academically with the difficulties they may have?

SPEAKER_00 18:58

Like with regards to them understanding, no study.

SPEAKER_05 19:05

Or would you recommend they see a tutor get a tutor involved?

SPEAKER_00 19:08

And depends how intense it is. I think with my adolescence, um, where I see the anxiety kind of move into the executive functioning, we absolutely work on that. And the initiation of tasks and um time management and honing on this word begin, I think, with a lot of my anxious kids, my anxious um littlers or adolescent um kids initiation is one of the biggest thing, um, and follow through. So we really work on skills for that. Um but yeah, it it definitely ties in. It ties in. It's very hard for me to separate a child's anxiety from their school performance right now. I think there's a lot of pressure in our in our community as well.

SPEAKER_05 19:50

So we've talked in previous podcasts about uh what we've called pseudo-ADHD. You know, where it's really the anxiety and the overthinking that gets in the way of focus and distractability and not true ADHD. And I'm sure you see that in kids as well.

SPEAKER_00 20:04

All the time. All the time. It's like a cloud. It's like a cloud that hovers. And I try to tell parents, you know, when this cloud's hovering, it's really challenging for kids to showcase what they're capable of, like with anything. Like if you have this this strong feeling and emotion that's blocking you from, you know, editing your work or starting a new assignment or speaking in front of the class or raising your hand. Like the kid's not able to showcase what they're actually capable of, especially if that cloud is dark enough. So really honing in on skills to get through that cloud and knowing that the cloud can change over time. Sometimes there's sun, sometimes there's lightning, and what we can do in those moments to change the weather of our anxiety would be helpful.

SPEAKER_04 20:41

I'm impressed that a lot of what you're talking about is uh helping skills, teaching skills, teaching coping mechanisms, teaching, you know, kind of what I talk about with adults very often, especially with anxiety, so look, your operating system needs to be replaced. We have a new operating system for you. And what you're kind of like dealing with that as well by trying to say, look, the system you're using, both to the kids and to the parents, is needs to be upgraded.

unknown 21:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:11

And so that requires you to be teaching a lot. I think a lot of people don't know, just like in our podcast, we've tried to communicate to people that uh a lot of times people don't know what to expect when they go see a mental health professional. They have no idea what they're gonna get into. So we've tried to teach about what we do, whether it be, you know, uh with medications or cognitive therapy or other kinds of therapy. But I bet you a lot of people don't know what a child psychologist does either. You know?

SPEAKER_02 21:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:43

And and hearing what you're saying today is is, yeah. I I look at the situation and I find things that need to be changed.

SPEAKER_00 21:50

I like the update metaphor.

unknown 21:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:52

I might steal that one.

SPEAKER_04 21:53

Oh, you got it.

SPEAKER_00 21:54

Yeah. I was like, your your iOS needs a has some bug, so we need to fix it.

SPEAKER_04 21:59

The difference is it doesn't

SPEAKER_05 22:05

But that gets to the stigma of kids having difficulties where the parent thinks my child must be damaged or inferior or not as good. And I guess you've got to help them with that to begin with and back away from that kind of notion that my my my kid is uh damaged or ill or inferior to the other kids.

SPEAKER_00 22:22

Yes. Um and that brings up a good point. So I find that a lot of the times, at least I can for our community or what I can speak to is um you know when things do go out of control. When things get out of control, I use the term kaflooy. Kaflooy. When they when you know parents yell, or when there is a moment of dysregulation between the whole family or an object is thrown, or they said something out of anger, you know, I really hone in on you know the science behind repair. And like that could be a moment of how I felt in that moment was valid. I wanted to tell you how I feel, but I absolutely did not need to yell at you for it. There were like three sentences I could have taken out of it. Let's reset. And I really emphasized a parent that like it does something to kind of you know your being and to the child's being, knowing that like we just went through something that's very human and very natural, obviously depending on the pattern. Um, and we repaired it together. And then we reconnected and we moved on. So repair to me is like very, very important in changing how we reflect back on what just happened in our family.

SPEAKER_05 23:32

I think I think parents frequently kind of get their buttons pushed and they'd lose it when they don't realize they can step back from it. The story I tell all the time is when my kids were seven and eleven, we had a little lake behind the house, and they we were they were outside and and beginning to get into a big argument, and and we I had a little inflatable raft in the back. And so my wife and I were out there and we they were screaming and yelling and ready for us to get part of that. So both of us got into the raft and rode away out in the lake. Both of them stopped arguing right away, looked at us dumbfounded, like, how could you do this to us? But that's that's that's the key. It is not let yourself get pulled into the the turmoil and the the nonsense.

SPEAKER_00 24:11

Taking things taking things personal too, like trying to just kind of see it. It's hard not to. It's your joy. We're all human. We're humans. Giving yourself grace. I always tell my families too, like space is grace. Like take a moment, take a breath, reflect.

SPEAKER_04 24:29

It's hard when that brain's kicked in and and all the adrenaline's going and and the end of the day frustration's built up, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Right.

SPEAKER_05 24:38

I'll teach them how to step back from the brink and not react to it.

SPEAKER_04 24:42

I like what you said about repair though, because I think what happens very often, whether it be in adults and or with adults and kids, it's like it sort of it reaches a climax, then it's like, all right, that's it, go to bed. Right. And then the next day it starts like as if either the day didn't happen or it just continues, but there's no repair. There's no like, what can we learn from this? Let's, you know, not just brood or carry the resentments or something. Repair is something that's probably missing in all of us.

SPEAKER_00 25:11

Yeah, it's one of the skills I find to be pretty much weaker than I expect.

SPEAKER_05 25:16

Um but it's it's very common to for things to snowball and you know that it's kind of like a toxic pattern of like, I'll remember this for later, and then it comes back later, I'll remember this for later, and then you're like kind of tallying like where we are in that moment based on the previous conflict, and like it's really a pattern we want to get out of, and repair really families have complicated dances and they keep doing the same dance over and over and over again, so it's hard to then learn a new way of doing it until you point it out to them that yes, you can make a change and why don't you try this and see what happens.

SPEAKER_00 25:48

Yeah, it's difficult. Repair can be difficult. Especially when I'm talking to parents or adults. Sometimes I feel like there's a lot of shame or they're not used to you know coming forward right away and addressing a situation. It's more of like, let's move on, let's get over it type of thing.

SPEAKER_04 26:10

There's no not gonna be any adults. That's okay.

SPEAKER_01 26:14

That's fair. Okay, okay. I'll pull it back a little bit.

SPEAKER_05 26:16

No, that's not fair. We won't mind it.

SPEAKER_04 26:18

Freud said there were three impossible professions. One was being a teacher, the other was being what we do, and the third was being a parent, because they really are very similar. And um but I I think it's it's a lot more difficult being a parent than any of those things. Because at least if it's somebody who you that's not your child, well, you know, you can detach a little bit and you know you may be not as emotionally reactive, but when it's your child, it's very hard to be, or any family member, it's very hard to have any degree of detachment. But you know, the bottom line is what we've said is we love what we do, and I know and I can see in just even our conversations, you love what you do, which is why people love to bring their kids to you.

SPEAKER_05 27:01

So and you provide such an important service. You know, it's really critical. Um, and unfortunately, there's not enough of you to go around in the community. I know, you're right about that. A lot of adult mental health professionals, but not a whole lot of child-related mental health professionals, and that's where the focus has to be.

SPEAKER_00 27:18

I do agree. I think parenting is the hardest job.

SPEAKER_04 27:24

And it and it never really ends. I mean, you know, we all know that just because your kid is now an adult, especially in our world today, you know, where 25 and 30 year olds are still living with their parents. So it it doesn't end just because they're big now.

SPEAKER_00 27:38

No.

SPEAKER_04 27:38

It's tough.

SPEAKER_00 27:39

It is. And having that I say all of this, but as a parent myself, you know, with an 11-year-old, I think being a parent has really helped define how I am as a psychologist. And I can say all these things and provide all these skills. But at the end of the day, when I'm really sitting in a conversation with a lot of these parents, you know, I can I can be pretty validating and real and relatable because parents have that we we relate to the throes and the survival. And sometimes they don't want to fix and parents just want to be heard, and that's sometimes what our sessions are about.

SPEAKER_04 28:15

Well, sometimes I say uh, you know, to be a uh uh somebody who does psychotherapy, you should have had some of it your own, so you know what it's like to be in that. Well, if you're working with kids, you ought to ma and you're a parent, you ought to automatically have the experience now. Yeah, so you know, you do, and you do a good job with it. So I want to thank you for coming on today. It's been enlightening. Thank you so much for having me. Hope you can come back again sometime.

SPEAKER_05 28:41

I've learned a lot and we've been working together now for quite a while, and it's been a pleasure. You guys are the best.

SPEAKER_04 28:46

Yeah, that'd be great. So for two shrinks in a mic, I'm Dr. Andrew Rosen.

SPEAKER_05 28:50

And I'm Dr. David Gross, and see you next time.

SPEAKER_04 28:53

Bye bye.

SPEAKER_03 28:54

The Two Shrinks in a Mike podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views expressed are those of the hosts and guests and do not constitute medical, legal, or professional advice.